Jun

Quotes from GSJC ‘09

Posted by CJ Ciaramella under GSJC 2009

Well, our epic trip to Prague is over. We all returned to Dulles International last night (although some of our luggage apparently did not) and went our separate ways. Sure, we all did a lot of serious learning and work, but lest we forget the more ridiculous parts of the trip, I’ve compiled the master list of quotes from the GSJC ‘09. Names have been omitted to protect the reputations and gainful employment of everyone, but you know who you are. Without further ado:

“Don’t be scientific. Sometimes you just need to light things on fire. One time I lit a piece of fried chicken on fire.”
On Czech cuisine: “The meat flows like a river.”
“We just juice things.”
“It looks like a horrible poodle accident.”
“This is the most real that unreal is.”
” … because it’s like you’re facing something that’s too big to wrap yourself around.” “What, like a really fat girl?”
“You can sing the song. Just don’t touch the wing.”
“I need you to be zen. You’re messing up my chai [sic].”
“Why solve a problem when you can belligerize it?”
“I’m saving myself for tonight.”
“How does ‘Golden Scissors’ remind you of a strip club?” “You know, like … cutting loose. [Picks up cell phone] Oh hey, mom!”
“You don’t have a space sharpie?”
” … that ol’ bi-racial luck of the draw.”
On feminism: “I’m cracking that window … that glass ceiling.”
“If you can’t beat ‘em, outbreed ‘em.”
“I’m gastronomically promiscuous.”
On discovering the Czech parliament meets in a room that was historically a large horse stable: “I wonder if there’s more or less horseshit in here now.”
On trying to get out of bed to go to the bar: “It’s like you’re playing a high-stakes card game and trying really hard to concentrate, but there’s this hot bitch all over you, and you can’t concentrate. My bed is that hot bitch.”
On obligations: “I just took the shot from hell for you. You’re going out tonight!”
On drink choices: “Velvet whatever. I’ll get anything with ‘velvet’ in the name.”
“There was a time when everything was legit.” “What about race-relations?” “Well, it was real.”
“Do you have a word in Czech for a girl, not necessarily a slut, but who’s just really messed up and drunk?” “Um, yeah … British.”
[In Slavic accent] “But … is for children.”
On liquid courage: “I’ll kill the king of the Nazguls!”
“I don’t want to be a girl with this person.”
On prosthetics: “You only need one hand to grope.”
“Oxtail is the best meat. It’s closest to the asshole.”
“The inside joke is not that you like testes.”
“Me and Alex decided that we and me were the drunkest people here.”